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"I Can't Lose You" - A Hamilton One-Shot [Writing #12]

Way back in 2016, I became OBSESSED with Hamilton: An American Musical. And I wrote a lot of one-shots. I was a big Ham/Laurens shipper. This is the first Hamilton one-shot I wrote. It's a modern AU hybrid because it's kind of modern, but they still have duels. I don't know what I was thinking at the time, but I still think it was a good work of mine. If you read it on my old AO3 account, this version is edited to be better, hopefully. Honestly, I wasn't really envisioning any of the cast members here.

If you're not a Ham/Laurens shipper move on. This one's not for you. Maybe next week I'll have one for you.

Words: 482

Alexander sat at his desk. He stared at his laptop screen. He was working on his next essay. Why pistol dueling should be outlawed. He was hoping to get it published before John's duel with Charles Lee. It wasn't that he didn't have faith in John, he just didn't want to risk losing him. A knock on his office door pulled his attention from his laptop. "Come in."
"Hi." It was John. "What are you up to? Is it important?"
"Why?" Alexander looked at the other man, over his glasses, which had fallen to the tip of his nose.
"Do I really need a reason?" John sat down across from Alexander. "What's that?" He reached for an early draft of the essay, before Alexander snatched it, crumbling it.
"Something about outlawing duels." Alexander took off his glasses, folded them and placed them in his desk drawer with the crumbled essay. John sighed, annoyed.
"Is this about my duel with Lee?"
"What makes you say that?" Alexander closed his laptop, knowing good and well he wasn't going to be doing any more writing until John left his office.
"Because you didn't give a shit about outlawing duels until now. I wouldn't be going through with it if it weren't necessary, but- the things he said and- if I remember correctly, you wanted to duel him, yourself. And you would have, had Washington not stopped you."
"Yes. But if it were me dueling, you know you'd be the one writing this essay." Alexander laughed, shaking his head. "I just don't want anything bad happening to you."
"Nothing is going to happen to me. I promise." John leaned over to rest his arm on Alexander's desk. "I will be fine. You just have to worry about Lee." He smirked, cocky. Alexander took a deep breath, clenching his fist. John grabbed his hand and kissed his knuckles. "You worry about me too much." He laughed. Alexander pulled his hand away. "What?"
"You think this is all a joke?"
"No. It's a very serious matter. But you're taking it too seriously."
"Too seriously?" Alexander asked. "John, there is a chance you could die or that you could kill Lee. That's pretty damn serious."
"Alright! But calm down!"
"John?"
"Yes, Alexander?"
"I- I can't-" Alexander took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "I can't lose you. I don't even want to think about losing you."
"Then don't think about it."
"You don't understand, John. If something happened to you I would- I'd go mad." Alexander looked at the other man. John stood up and leaned on the desk, kissing Alexander's forehead.
"I promise that nothing will happen to me. I am going to let you get back to your essay." He walked to the door. Stopping, he turned back to Alexander. "I love you, Alexander." Before the other man could react or respond, John left the office.

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