I have had the most fun writing Falsettos one-shots because the characters are just so fun to write about and to try to capture their voices. This is the tight-knit family getting ready for and taking family photos.
Mendel fought with his tie. Marvin never specified if the dress code was dressy or not. So to be on the safer side, Mendel decided to dress up.
"Mendel?" Trina walked into their bedroom, she watched Mendel fight with his tie for a few moments before laughing. "What are you doing?"
"I am trying to finish getting dressed." He explained, letting the tie hang around his neck.
"Keyword: trying." Trina laughed. "Forget the tie. Unbutton the top button of your shirt and you'll be fine."
"But-"
"Mendel, honey, don't bother arguing. Today is not the day. Marvin will tell you." Trina sighed. "Come on. The sooner we leave the sooner we get there and then we can get this all over and done with. Jason and I will be in the car."
"Okay." Mendel followed what Trina said and unbuttoned the top button of his shirt. He checked his phone to see three texts from Marvin. He really was micromanaging.
Marvin: Here's a tip for today: don't bother arguing with Trina today.
Marvin: Seriously.
Marvin: Unless you want to sleep on the couch. Don't do it. I know from unfortunate experience.
There goes the warning. Mendel put his phone in his pocket and took a deep breath, bracing himself for today, which he knew was going to be stressful.
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"Whizzer, come on. I want to be the first one to get to the studio." Marvin whined.
"Hey! It takes hard work to look this good!" Whizzer yelled from the bathroom. Marvin checked his watch. Whizzer walked into the kitchen. "Alright. Let's go." He wore a bright pink polo and jeans.
"He's wearing jeans for once. It's a miracle!" Marvin laughed.
"You said it was a casual family photo." Whizzer rolled his eyes. "Come on. Charles is expecting us."
"Ah, yes. Charles Winston. The scum of the earth." Marvin wasn't thrilled to see Whizzer's ex, Charles, but he was giving them a good discount on the photos and he was good at what he did.
"Come on. Give Charles a break. He's doing a favor for us today. I don't want you getting jealous and losing your head." Whizzer explained. "Remember last time we spent time with Charles?"
"When he was drooling all over you so I asserted my dominance and you got annoyed?" Marvin asked.
"He was not drooling all over me."
"Yes, he was! The way he was acting then was how I was when we first met!"
"Let's just go. We can argue in the car." Whizzer rolled his eyes. He knew Marvin was going to make today unpleasant.
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"Delia? We have twenty minutes to get there before Marvin calls and starts bitching that we're late." Charlotte explained, as she waited for her girlfriend to say goodbye to their three cats for the fifth time. "We'll be back. It's not like we're leaving them for the weekend."
"I know, but we'll be there all day, knowing Marvin and I'm going to miss them," Cordelia explained, picking up Ezekiel - named by Jason. "They are our children and we are leaving them for a long time."
"Alright. Well, hurry up so we can leave." Charlotte couldn't help but smile at the blonde. As quirky as Cordelia was, Charlotte loved her.
"Alright, boys, both mamas are leaving for family photos. Be safe. Don't answer the door for anyone. And don't throw a party. We will know." Cordelia put Ezekiel down. "We will be back as soon as we can." Charlotte wasn't much of a cat person, but seeing how happy Cordelia was taking care of the strays, she couldn't say no. She had to admit she was becoming fond of them. Especially Ezekiel, whom she nicknamed Zeke. They had him since he was a kitten and he was the least annoying.
"Don't forget to use the lint roller in the car."
"Right! Because Marvin and Mendel are allergic. Did we leave enough food?"
"Yes."
"Water?"
"Of course."
"But what if they want to watch TV?" Cordelia asked.
"Dells, they're cats."
"But they watch Chopped with my all the time."
"Fine." Charlotte turned on the TV. It was always on Food Network since that's all Cordelia watched.
"Thank you." Cordelia kissed Charlotte's cheek. They left the house.
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"I know, but we'll be there all day, knowing Marvin and I'm going to miss them," Cordelia explained, picking up Ezekiel - named by Jason. "They are our children and we are leaving them for a long time."
"Alright. Well, hurry up so we can leave." Charlotte couldn't help but smile at the blonde. As quirky as Cordelia was, Charlotte loved her.
"Alright, boys, both mamas are leaving for family photos. Be safe. Don't answer the door for anyone. And don't throw a party. We will know." Cordelia put Ezekiel down. "We will be back as soon as we can." Charlotte wasn't much of a cat person, but seeing how happy Cordelia was taking care of the strays, she couldn't say no. She had to admit she was becoming fond of them. Especially Ezekiel, whom she nicknamed Zeke. They had him since he was a kitten and he was the least annoying.
"Don't forget to use the lint roller in the car."
"Right! Because Marvin and Mendel are allergic. Did we leave enough food?"
"Yes."
"Water?"
"Of course."
"But what if they want to watch TV?" Cordelia asked.
"Dells, they're cats."
"But they watch Chopped with my all the time."
"Fine." Charlotte turned on the TV. It was always on Food Network since that's all Cordelia watched.
"Thank you." Cordelia kissed Charlotte's cheek. They left the house.
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Whizzer and Marvin pulled up to a brick building. A large white sign read "Winston Photography" in golden lettering. Whizzer smirked a little, getting an eye roll from Marvin. They got out of the car and walked into the studio. It was empty except for some backdrops, a few tripods, and some props.
"Charles?" Whizzer asked. "Is anyone here?"
"Hi! Sorry." The handsome blonde, Charles, exited a door in the back. "Good morning, gentlemen."
"Hi, Charles." Whizzer hugged him. "How are you?"
"I'm doing well. And yourself? You look good." Charles looked him up and down. "Have you been working out?"
"When does he not work out?" Marvin asked. Charles looked at him.
"Hello, Marvin. Pleasure seeing you." Charles' fake smile was almost as charming as his genuine smile.
"Likewise, Chuck." Marvin knew how much it annoyed Charles to be called by any nickname. And he knew Charles wouldn't say anything. "Everyone should be here shortly."
"Great. I cleared my day because I know how hectic family portraits are." Charles explained.
"I really appreciate you doing this for us," Whizzer explained.
"Anything for you, Micah." Charles smiled. It aggravated Marvin. Whizzer hated anyone using his real name. Anyone except Charles. For some reason, Charles got a pass. Not even Marvin could call him Micah. Only Charles.
"This is a nice studio." Marvin wanted to make nice for as long as he could tolerate it.
"Thanks. I am thinking of extending it and finding a partner. What do you say?" Charles looked at Whizzer.
"You know I work alone. I appreciate the offer, but-"
"Come on. You don't even have a set studio. You rent places for a day which is not going to help your business grow. We can both work from here. It can be Winston-Brown Photography."
"Shouldn't it be in alphabetical order?" Marvin asked.
"No. Winston-Brown sounds better." Whizzer pointed out. "You gave this thought, didn't you?" He laughed.
"Yes. For a while. Come on. We used to work so well together."
"Yeah, when you were dating." Marvin pointed out. He checked the time, hoping everyone else would arrive soon. Someone hit the front door, grabbing their attention. Mendel tried pushing the pull door.
"One of your friends?" Charles asked.
"My kid's stepfather," Marvin explained, sighing in relief. Trina pulled open the door.
"Thank you, honey." Mendel held open the door for Trina and Jason.
"Hi." Trina smiled, despite already being annoyed.
"Hey, kid." Marvin rustled Jason's hair.
"Stop!" Trina barked, fixing Jason's hair. "Sorry. I just-" She signed. "How are you guys?" She asked.
"We're doing alright. This is Charles. Charles, this is Trina, Mendel, and Jason." Whizzer did a roll call.
"Pleasure." Charles shook Mendel's hand. Marvin and Trina looked at each other annoyed.
"Who else are we waiting for?" Charles asked.
"Uh- Delia and Char, are coming right?" Whizzer asked. Marvin nodded.
"Well we can start with photos of Jason and his dads and-" Charles began before getting cut off by Marvin.
"I'd like to wait for the whole family before we start." He explained.
"Okay. That's fine. I'll be in the darkroom. Let me know when you want to start." Charles smirked at Mendel, before going to the back.
"Oh- my God. Is he serious?" Trina asked. Marvin laughed. "Well, Mav. I can see why you don't like him."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Whizzer asked.
"He was flirting with my husband! Or at him." Trina replied, obviously annoyed.
"He was?" Mendel asked, seemingly clueless as usual.
"That's just Charles. He flirts with- everyone."
"He didn't flirt with me." Trina crossed her arms.
"Nor me," Marvin added.
"Well- he-" Whizzer tried to defend his old friend, but they had a point. "That's just who he is. Cut him some slack. You guys are jealous for now reason. First of all Mendel is as straight as they come. And secondly, I'm not going to leave you for him. Even if he did compliment me on working out." Whizzer's smirk made Marvin roll his eyes. They were all acting like they were in high school.
"I like him," Jason spoke up. All four adults looked at him.
"Who? Charles?" Mendel asked.
"Yeah. I mean he seems cool." Jason shrugged.
'See at least your kid as a good judge of character." Whizzer patted Jason's shoulder. "If Charles was a bad person, I wouldn't still be friends with him."
"You're still friends with him because-" Marvin was cut off by Charlotte and Cordelia rushing in.
"We're not late, are we?" Charlotte asked.
"No. You're on time." Marvin smiled, relieved. "Now we can get it over and done with so I don't have to see Charles until our next family photos."
"Who's Charles?" Charlotte asked.
"Charles is Whizzer's evil ex-boyfriend who is taking our photos," Cordelia explained. Whizzer glared at her. "What? He is evil. You know I can't stand him."
"Wow. Even Delia doesn't like him. That's saying something." Trina laughed.
"But-" Charlotte seemed confused.
"I'll go get him so we can start." Whizzer walked to the darkroom.
"Don't take too long or we'll have to go in after you." Trina teased. Whizzer flipped her off, but kept walking, making Jason laugh. Marvin looked at his ex-wife. "What?" After a few moments, Whizzer and Charles came out of the darkroom. Charles said something making Whizzer laugh which made Marvin uncomfortable.
"Oh. Delia." Charles stopped, recognizing the blonde. "How are you?"
"It's Cordelia and I'm doing okay. This is my wife, Charlotte. I see you have a really nice studio."
"Thank you, I-"
"I'm not here to make small talk, Chad. I'm here to take photos with my family." Cordelia's bitterness caught everyone, but Whizzer off guard.
"Fair enough. What do you want to start with first?" Charles asked. Everyone looked at Marvin.
"Uh- we can do- how about a photo of Jason and his dads?" He shrugged.
"Alright. Do you guys want the navy blue backdrop or the grey?" Charles asked, looking at Whizzer.
"Uhm-" Whizzer looked at Mendel and Marvin's outfits. "I think we should do the grey backdrop because Mendel would just be a floating head with the navy blue one."
"Grey it is. Take your positions. Whatever you want, but I suggest Jace be in the front."
"Jace?" Marvin asked.
"Jason." Charles clarified.
"Trina and I named him Jason, not Jace. I would appreciate it if-"
"Babe, relax." Whizzer put his hand on Marvin's back.
"Sorry." Marvin took a deep breath. Tensions were high and Mavin was ready to burst.
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As the men posed for their portrait, the women watched.
"Are you okay?" Charlotte asked her wife in a hushed whisper.
"Fine. Why?" Cordelia asked.
"Do you have history with that guy?" Charlotte asked. Trina moved closer, interested.
"I don't, but Whiz does. Charles is a damn good photographer. I'll give him that, but he is the devil himself. It's safe to say that I- I hate him, honestly."
"My God. Do you have dirt on him?" Trina asked. "Because he tried flirting with Mendel. Good thing my husband is too dull to have noticed."
"When he and Whizzer were together he wasn't the greatest guy and if it weren't for me, they might still be together," Cordelia explained.
"Do you think Marvin knows about their history?" Trina asked.
"I think so, but even if he doesn't that's not my place. It's Whizzer's job to tell him. I am not going to overstep my boundaries."
_____________________________________________________________________________
The family decided to take a break after the first three hours of shooting. No one could agree on which position was the best for every photo and there had been non-stop arguing. Marvin, Trina and Cordelia went outside for some air. Whizzer and Charles were trying to catch up.
"So are you and Marvin serious?" Charles asked.
"We are. Why do you ask?"
"He seems really controlling," Charles replied. Whizzer looked at him.
"And you weren't controlling when we were together?" Whizzer asked.
"But- I mean-"
"I love Mavin. Sure he's rough around the edges, but he's a great guy and an amazing dad. You need to stop the flirting with Mendel and I because its bothering Trina and Marvin. I know it's part of your charm, but they are two people you do not want to piss off. And you know- I'm not going to leave Marvin for anyone. Especially not you. You had your chance and you blew it. If you really cared about me you wouldn't have cheated on my all those years ago. Move on, Charles. Because I have." Whizzer let it all out. Charles looked at him, not knowing he had it in him.
"Alright. I'll back off. I'm sorry you feel so strongly." Charles took a deep breath.
"Jason, go get them, please." Whizzer couldn't wait to get this over and done with now. Jason walked outside to be greeted by a puff of smoke.
"Shit. Sorry, honey." Trina fanned the smoke out of his face. "Do they want us back?" She asked.
"Yeah. I didn't know you guys smoked." He looked at the three adults.
"Well you need a cigarette sometimes when you're around someone as toxic as Chad." Cordelia threw her cigarette on the floor. "I'm glad he's gay because if he tried hitting on my Charlotte, I might kill him." She explained, walking back into the building. Trina and Marvin looked at each other, concerned.
"I've never seen her like this." Jason pointed out.
"She must know something about Charles we don't." Trina shrugged. She offered Marvin another drag of the cigarette they shared. He shook his head, making her throw it on the ground and put it out with her heel. "Shall we go, gentlemen?" She motioned to the door. They walked back into the studio, not looking forward to the rest of the shoot.
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It took another three excruciating hours before the family portraits were finally finished. Tensions had calmed down and everyone just wanted to get dinner and forget the day already.
"Alrighty. We are all done here." Charles looked at the photos in his camera.
"How long will it take?" Mendel asked.
"You can pick up the prints on Friday. They'll be under Whizzer's name." Charles explained. "It was a pleasure photographing you guys."
"Alright. Thanks, Charles." Whizzer smiled. Charles nodded and disappeared into the darkroom.
"I'm in the mood for ice cream," Cordelia explained, wrapping her arms around Charlotte.
"Sounds good, but what's happening for dinner?" Whizzer asked.
"There's that buffet place downtown. A few coworkers and I go there for lunch sometimes." Charlotte explained.
"Anyone opposed to the buffet?" Marvin asked.
"Buffet sounds great." Trina smiled.
"Alright. Let's go."
"Charles?" Whizzer asked. "Is anyone here?"
"Hi! Sorry." The handsome blonde, Charles, exited a door in the back. "Good morning, gentlemen."
"Hi, Charles." Whizzer hugged him. "How are you?"
"I'm doing well. And yourself? You look good." Charles looked him up and down. "Have you been working out?"
"When does he not work out?" Marvin asked. Charles looked at him.
"Hello, Marvin. Pleasure seeing you." Charles' fake smile was almost as charming as his genuine smile.
"Likewise, Chuck." Marvin knew how much it annoyed Charles to be called by any nickname. And he knew Charles wouldn't say anything. "Everyone should be here shortly."
"Great. I cleared my day because I know how hectic family portraits are." Charles explained.
"I really appreciate you doing this for us," Whizzer explained.
"Anything for you, Micah." Charles smiled. It aggravated Marvin. Whizzer hated anyone using his real name. Anyone except Charles. For some reason, Charles got a pass. Not even Marvin could call him Micah. Only Charles.
"This is a nice studio." Marvin wanted to make nice for as long as he could tolerate it.
"Thanks. I am thinking of extending it and finding a partner. What do you say?" Charles looked at Whizzer.
"You know I work alone. I appreciate the offer, but-"
"Come on. You don't even have a set studio. You rent places for a day which is not going to help your business grow. We can both work from here. It can be Winston-Brown Photography."
"Shouldn't it be in alphabetical order?" Marvin asked.
"No. Winston-Brown sounds better." Whizzer pointed out. "You gave this thought, didn't you?" He laughed.
"Yes. For a while. Come on. We used to work so well together."
"Yeah, when you were dating." Marvin pointed out. He checked the time, hoping everyone else would arrive soon. Someone hit the front door, grabbing their attention. Mendel tried pushing the pull door.
"One of your friends?" Charles asked.
"My kid's stepfather," Marvin explained, sighing in relief. Trina pulled open the door.
"Thank you, honey." Mendel held open the door for Trina and Jason.
"Hi." Trina smiled, despite already being annoyed.
"Hey, kid." Marvin rustled Jason's hair.
"Stop!" Trina barked, fixing Jason's hair. "Sorry. I just-" She signed. "How are you guys?" She asked.
"We're doing alright. This is Charles. Charles, this is Trina, Mendel, and Jason." Whizzer did a roll call.
"Pleasure." Charles shook Mendel's hand. Marvin and Trina looked at each other annoyed.
"Who else are we waiting for?" Charles asked.
"Uh- Delia and Char, are coming right?" Whizzer asked. Marvin nodded.
"Well we can start with photos of Jason and his dads and-" Charles began before getting cut off by Marvin.
"I'd like to wait for the whole family before we start." He explained.
"Okay. That's fine. I'll be in the darkroom. Let me know when you want to start." Charles smirked at Mendel, before going to the back.
"Oh- my God. Is he serious?" Trina asked. Marvin laughed. "Well, Mav. I can see why you don't like him."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Whizzer asked.
"He was flirting with my husband! Or at him." Trina replied, obviously annoyed.
"He was?" Mendel asked, seemingly clueless as usual.
"That's just Charles. He flirts with- everyone."
"He didn't flirt with me." Trina crossed her arms.
"Nor me," Marvin added.
"Well- he-" Whizzer tried to defend his old friend, but they had a point. "That's just who he is. Cut him some slack. You guys are jealous for now reason. First of all Mendel is as straight as they come. And secondly, I'm not going to leave you for him. Even if he did compliment me on working out." Whizzer's smirk made Marvin roll his eyes. They were all acting like they were in high school.
"I like him," Jason spoke up. All four adults looked at him.
"Who? Charles?" Mendel asked.
"Yeah. I mean he seems cool." Jason shrugged.
'See at least your kid as a good judge of character." Whizzer patted Jason's shoulder. "If Charles was a bad person, I wouldn't still be friends with him."
"You're still friends with him because-" Marvin was cut off by Charlotte and Cordelia rushing in.
"We're not late, are we?" Charlotte asked.
"No. You're on time." Marvin smiled, relieved. "Now we can get it over and done with so I don't have to see Charles until our next family photos."
"Who's Charles?" Charlotte asked.
"Charles is Whizzer's evil ex-boyfriend who is taking our photos," Cordelia explained. Whizzer glared at her. "What? He is evil. You know I can't stand him."
"Wow. Even Delia doesn't like him. That's saying something." Trina laughed.
"But-" Charlotte seemed confused.
"I'll go get him so we can start." Whizzer walked to the darkroom.
"Don't take too long or we'll have to go in after you." Trina teased. Whizzer flipped her off, but kept walking, making Jason laugh. Marvin looked at his ex-wife. "What?" After a few moments, Whizzer and Charles came out of the darkroom. Charles said something making Whizzer laugh which made Marvin uncomfortable.
"Oh. Delia." Charles stopped, recognizing the blonde. "How are you?"
"It's Cordelia and I'm doing okay. This is my wife, Charlotte. I see you have a really nice studio."
"Thank you, I-"
"I'm not here to make small talk, Chad. I'm here to take photos with my family." Cordelia's bitterness caught everyone, but Whizzer off guard.
"Fair enough. What do you want to start with first?" Charles asked. Everyone looked at Marvin.
"Uh- we can do- how about a photo of Jason and his dads?" He shrugged.
"Alright. Do you guys want the navy blue backdrop or the grey?" Charles asked, looking at Whizzer.
"Uhm-" Whizzer looked at Mendel and Marvin's outfits. "I think we should do the grey backdrop because Mendel would just be a floating head with the navy blue one."
"Grey it is. Take your positions. Whatever you want, but I suggest Jace be in the front."
"Jace?" Marvin asked.
"Jason." Charles clarified.
"Trina and I named him Jason, not Jace. I would appreciate it if-"
"Babe, relax." Whizzer put his hand on Marvin's back.
"Sorry." Marvin took a deep breath. Tensions were high and Mavin was ready to burst.
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As the men posed for their portrait, the women watched.
"Are you okay?" Charlotte asked her wife in a hushed whisper.
"Fine. Why?" Cordelia asked.
"Do you have history with that guy?" Charlotte asked. Trina moved closer, interested.
"I don't, but Whiz does. Charles is a damn good photographer. I'll give him that, but he is the devil himself. It's safe to say that I- I hate him, honestly."
"My God. Do you have dirt on him?" Trina asked. "Because he tried flirting with Mendel. Good thing my husband is too dull to have noticed."
"When he and Whizzer were together he wasn't the greatest guy and if it weren't for me, they might still be together," Cordelia explained.
"Do you think Marvin knows about their history?" Trina asked.
"I think so, but even if he doesn't that's not my place. It's Whizzer's job to tell him. I am not going to overstep my boundaries."
_____________________________________________________________________________
The family decided to take a break after the first three hours of shooting. No one could agree on which position was the best for every photo and there had been non-stop arguing. Marvin, Trina and Cordelia went outside for some air. Whizzer and Charles were trying to catch up.
"So are you and Marvin serious?" Charles asked.
"We are. Why do you ask?"
"He seems really controlling," Charles replied. Whizzer looked at him.
"And you weren't controlling when we were together?" Whizzer asked.
"But- I mean-"
"I love Mavin. Sure he's rough around the edges, but he's a great guy and an amazing dad. You need to stop the flirting with Mendel and I because its bothering Trina and Marvin. I know it's part of your charm, but they are two people you do not want to piss off. And you know- I'm not going to leave Marvin for anyone. Especially not you. You had your chance and you blew it. If you really cared about me you wouldn't have cheated on my all those years ago. Move on, Charles. Because I have." Whizzer let it all out. Charles looked at him, not knowing he had it in him.
"Alright. I'll back off. I'm sorry you feel so strongly." Charles took a deep breath.
"Jason, go get them, please." Whizzer couldn't wait to get this over and done with now. Jason walked outside to be greeted by a puff of smoke.
"Shit. Sorry, honey." Trina fanned the smoke out of his face. "Do they want us back?" She asked.
"Yeah. I didn't know you guys smoked." He looked at the three adults.
"Well you need a cigarette sometimes when you're around someone as toxic as Chad." Cordelia threw her cigarette on the floor. "I'm glad he's gay because if he tried hitting on my Charlotte, I might kill him." She explained, walking back into the building. Trina and Marvin looked at each other, concerned.
"I've never seen her like this." Jason pointed out.
"She must know something about Charles we don't." Trina shrugged. She offered Marvin another drag of the cigarette they shared. He shook his head, making her throw it on the ground and put it out with her heel. "Shall we go, gentlemen?" She motioned to the door. They walked back into the studio, not looking forward to the rest of the shoot.
_____________________________________________________________________________
It took another three excruciating hours before the family portraits were finally finished. Tensions had calmed down and everyone just wanted to get dinner and forget the day already.
"Alrighty. We are all done here." Charles looked at the photos in his camera.
"How long will it take?" Mendel asked.
"You can pick up the prints on Friday. They'll be under Whizzer's name." Charles explained. "It was a pleasure photographing you guys."
"Alright. Thanks, Charles." Whizzer smiled. Charles nodded and disappeared into the darkroom.
"I'm in the mood for ice cream," Cordelia explained, wrapping her arms around Charlotte.
"Sounds good, but what's happening for dinner?" Whizzer asked.
"There's that buffet place downtown. A few coworkers and I go there for lunch sometimes." Charlotte explained.
"Anyone opposed to the buffet?" Marvin asked.
"Buffet sounds great." Trina smiled.
"Alright. Let's go."
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